Turning my face up

I always feel guilty these days about not blogging more. I was such a faithful blogger in the beginning--why was that?--oh yeah, I didn't have a baby when I first started this blog. But I don't feel too bad because I keep a paper journal that I write in pretty regularly, so my life and Will's babyhood are being documented. I was reading through it today and found this nice passage about Will and me at the park, dated January 16.

It is 5:30 on a Wednesday and the apartment is quiet. John is still at Pepperdine. Will is sleeping late. Just a few minutes ago I went into his room and put my hand on his back and felt him breathe. I want to remember that. I just stood next to his crib and looked at his little peaceful face and felt him breathe, and I loved him.

He likes to slide backwards down the slides at the park, feet first, on his stomach. It makes him shriek with laughter. He likes to find and pick up and chew on sticks, only I won't let him chew them. I say, "We don't eat sticks," and I say, "Bleck!" which he thinks is very funny. Today there was an abandoned ball at the park, faded blue and dirty, and Will loved it at first sight and held it and chased it when the wind blew it across the grass. Today was the first day it was windy at the park. On the swing Will turned his face up to the sun and smiled.

That was a good day, which was good to remember, because today Will was cranky most of the day. I don't know if he is teething. It's been months since he got any new teeth. Or I suppose it could be that I am switching him over to cow's milk from formula, and that could be making his tummy hurt or something. I don't know. I just know that after hours of him fussing and clinging on to me, on a long day when it's raining outside and we don't leave the house, it's good to think back on sunny days in the park, when we could turn our faces up to the sun.